Wow another year has come and gone by so quickly.  I didn’t even really have time to reflect.  I will definitely make it a point to do so this year.  So many things I would love to say, but don’t want to get all sappy.  Oh what the heck, it’s my blog and I can cry if I want to!!!!  2009 started off very, very sad for me and my family.  We lost my brother Michael on January 11th.  It was a very devastating time for us.  I do not know how my mother has kept it together so well.  This is her 2nd child that has passed away before her.  I am in awe at how amazingly strong she is.  I have made a vow to call her every day since then.  I know she needs me, I know I need her.  We need each other to lean on.  Who would think that you would have something to talk about each and every day???  We do.  Sometimes we talk about everything, sometimes we talk about nothing.  Just knowing that she knows how much I care and how much I love her makes me happy.  And now on to the happier times in 2009…. (wiping tears from my eyes).  I am grateful that this rough time has brought me andmy mother closer.  I don’t think we have been this close since I was a child bugging the crap out of her!  It is a great feeling.  I am blessed.  Blessed with the family that I do still have around.  Blessed with amazing children that keep me on my toes and an amazing boyfriend that helps me out with it all!  My photography business is FINALLY picking up and I cannot wait for it to kick off.  This year I have finally taken the time to focus on that.  I do not know why I have not done it sooner.  Maybe I was afraid, afraid that I was not good enough.  Afraid to fail.  Afraid to disappoint someone.  I am finally getting over my fear.  I put all that I have into my photography.  It’s the best of what I can do at the moment and I am happy with it.  All of your lovely comments on facebook, twitter and my blog have inspired me to do even better, each and every time!! I thank you for giving me that!  Without you I would be nothing! Please know how sincere I am that you have helped me in a way that you didn’t even know you were helping me out with.  You are all truly amazing and I want you to know that!  From my family to yours… here is wishing you all the very best 2010!!!  May your days be full of laughter, your home be filled with family and friends, your heart be full of forgiveness, love, joy and inspiration to keep you going.  May you be fearless to do all the things you hoped and dreamed of doing.  This is our year!!!!  Go out there and make it happen!!! 

Big hugs!!!

Be safe out there and enjoy!

Love,

Denise, Josh, Robert, Leilani and Kahne

May your holiday be filled with tons of laughter and warmth from your family and friends!!!  I so enjoy spending time with loved ones and it feels great to be wrapped around the love that pours out from them all.  It’s been a great year… tough, but great.  May 2010 bring us all joy and happiness to last a lifetime.

Love,

Denise, Josh, Robert, Leilani & Kahne

I am thankful for loving. Loving life. Loving my family. Loving my friends. Loving God. And most of all, loving myself. There have been so many challenges along the way that you think would prevent me from loving again. But I keep on going. I get passed all the hard times and look at the positive things happening in the now. My health, my children, my full time job at Fidelity, my photography business, passion, commitment, drive, that allows me to chug along even when at times I feel I do not have the strength to do so. I have a very supportive boyfriend who puts up with my bickering, my edginess, my busy schedule that takes time away from him and he lifts my spirits up with his kindness, his gentle words, his ever giving helping hand with my children to allow me to make my dreams come true and I am thankful for every single moment. Josh, I really hope that you are reading this and know how grateful I am for giving your all with my family and for supporting me 100% with everything I do. My children love you and I could not ask for a better person to spend my life with or a better Father Figure for my children to look up to. You are my rock. Thank you for everything!!! Right now I miss my mom like crazy while she is away in El Paso taking care of my grandfather, but I am thankful that she was able to retire early and has the time to spend these last years with her dad and with her family that I am sure she missed so much!!! Mom, I’m going crazy without you here! I can not believe I have made it this long without you by my side. You are my heart and soul. You inspire me to push forward. Watching you all these years has given me perspective in life and I thank you for being such a wonderful person and such a strong, loving mother, I know this is a tough year for us. I miss my brothers so much. I miss my father. The table has been and will be lonely this year without them all. I am sure they are all celebrating in heaven at a nice big, beautiful table. I am thankful for my brother Sammy who is still here with us and who I love with all my heart and wish I saw more of, for my brother Eric and my sister Rene who I totally adore and NEED to spend more time with. For my Step-mom, Rochelle, thank you for staying in my life after all these years, even when things were rough, I am glad we overcame it all and that we can look back and joke about it. To my children who have defined me and who have made me who I am today, you mean the world to me and I would never have come this far without you!!!! I hope you know just how much you truly inspire me to do better!! Always! To Angie, thank you for coming all this way to spend Thanksgiving with us, it means so much to Josh and to my family to have you here and it’s been nice for me to actually take a week off of work to enjoy the time sitting in the beautiful weather, talking about life. It has been so refreshing and such a great get-a-way, and I can not thank you enough for being such a wonderful “almost” mother-in-law. To all my friends, you know who you are. Thank you for always being there for me and for making my heart smile! To all my nephews, nieces, cousins, aunts, uncles, sis-in-law, I am thankful for having a great, big, beautiful family to spend my life with. And thank you to all my readers. You guys Rock!!!! I hope you enjoy your day and live every moment like it was your last.

And here is a snap of my brother Michael who just passed away in January of this year. He put up such a strong fight. He was so young, so loving. Thanksgiving was the only day that he was able to get out of the Nursing Home and come to my house to enjoy a nice, lovely feast. I miss you dearly. It’s very hard not having you here today. I love you and I am happy that you are finally at peace and are no longer suffering.

#33 Get rid of at least 15 pairs of shoes (without buying new ones) is now checked off my 101 in 1001

Hi, my name is Denise and I am a shoe-a-holic. Yes, the first step is admitting that you have an addiction. Glad that is over with. Well the admitting part, not the addiction. I find comfort in buying shoes, something about wearing pretty shoes makes me feel alive. A nice pair o’ stilettos to make you feel like a woman (rawr), a nice pair of Jessica Simpson pumps to make you feel sophisticated, a nice pair of wedge shoes to wear with a cute little summer dress somehow makes me humble. I love shoes! I realize that some of these shoes have never been worn and that internet is a problem. If I have had a rough week at work, I don’t eat chocolate, I shop. For shoes. I am not proud of it. I cringe when I even come close to a shoe store cuz I know, it’s gonna suck me in, like a vacuum, a big black hole of nothing but pure bliss. Helloooooo Lovah, Yes. Yes. I am that girl, Carrie, from Sex and the City… except in the dollar amount that I can afford (of course) because Lord help me if I ever have the money to purchase some expensive shoes… watch out world. Carrie Bradshaw will have NOTHING compared to me! So as hard as it was to do this, I am sure they will find a nice home and someone out there will enjoy them as much as I did. I will miss you!!! It was fun while it lasted! You all totally rocked my world and made me feel like a woman and I thank you for that. Sigh. Adios mis sapatos.

Hello Lovelies

These shoes put me in a boot for 2 months and physical therapy for another 2 months and I am barely getting back into heels again. Ouch. Dangerous! (I would rather not talk about this incident).

Gold Shoes. Yum. Need I say more?

It was fun while it lasted oh colorful ones

The next few pair are so beautiful but I never got the chance to wear them because of my injury and do not think I am brave enough to wear them any time soon. So I MUST part from them. Can you hear my heart breaking???